As James held the gun to his temple, he began to shake violently. Sweat rolled down his face and a tear began to form in his eye. As he closed his eyes to pull the trigger his life began to rewind itself. These are the tales of a ordinary man pushed to his limits.
James had a great family who always supported him through thick and thin. James and his father had a very close relationship and James always knew he could go to him for anything. Over the past few years James had gone to his father quite frequently about his problems with his now ex-wife and bills. James' father always reassured him that he would be quite alright and to not worry so much about it. He would always make James feel better.
As James held his eyes closed picturing images of his father, he began to cry heavily and gripped the gun until his hands were white. James' father had died 6 months earlier due to heart attack and this hit James' hard. James opened his eyes and walked over to his dresser. On top of this dresser he had a picture of his father. James picked it up and asked his father to forgive him repeatedly. As he put the picture frame down, he closed his eyes and stood straight with the gun firm to his head.
The day his wife gave birth to his baby boy, James couldn't be happier. He had the most precious thing in the world right in his arms. They called him James the Third. James was the family name. As the baby uttered its first cries, James looked at his wife, smiled and said, "Look at his eyes. He has your eyes. They are beautiful".
James hadn't seen his son in 4 years due to the divorce. Cindy, his ex-wife, got custody of the child and James could see him on the weekends. Cindy had moved to Florida 4 years ago and took her son with her. James still loved Cindy, but things just didn't work out. James held his eyes closed as he shook those images from his head.
James, keeping the gun to his head, got on his knees and prayed to God. He asked God this, "Why are things so bad? Why must things be this way? What have I done so wrong to deserve this?" Suddenly James felt that he wasn't alone and a strange sensation came over him as he felt a hand touch his shoulder. As he spun around to see who it was, he was shocked. No one was there. He looked down at the gun and quickly dropped it. He ran outside and fell to the ground, thanking God for saving his life. James went to church the following Sunday and Claimed his spot in the Book of Life.
-5 years later-
James sat on his front porch, not too far from where he had once collapsed and prayed to God, thinking about his past. He told himself that God has a plan for us all. There is a reason for everything that we go through and God will see you through your hardships. James was now a devout Christian. He attended church every Sunday and every Wednesday. God is good.
You know, God is good. The above story was completely made up from my mind about the power of God.
I have been through a lot in my short time here, and I have had my times where I have said that I wanted to kill myself. I am not ashamed of my past and I can proudly say that those thoughts are gone. I am happy, and content with my life right now. Things are getting better all around in my life, albeit the few things that still need work.
The point is this- Whether you believe in God or not, suicide is never an option. You may think that no one will miss you, or that you being gone won't affect anyone. These are all lies.
There is always at least that one person who would be crushed if something like that were to happen to you. Please think about the actions that you commit. Don't rush to anything. Talk to a friend, a parent, a mentor about things in your life. let your problems go.
I dont know where the inspiration to write this came from, but I felt lead to do it. It probably contains spelling or other errors, but that wasn't the point of this. Please do not correct it in the comments below. If you feel the need to share your story, please do so below in the comments. If you need someone to talk to, I am here. My number is in the info section of my profile page. Please, take care of yourself. Thank you for reading.