I know the topic is being dragged out at this point, but I want to weigh in because I have a different background and perspective than others.
As someone who’s band director was arrested their freshman year due to inappropriate relationships with a student, I wish the topic had been more discussed and mulled over before and when it had happened.
For the longest time, I defended that director. He hadn’t yet been proven guilty, so I defended him. But not only did I defend him, I defended the questionable things he did as well.
I thought him spending hours talking to kids in his office after rehearsal was normal. I thought him driving kids home after rehearsal was just the thing directors did. I saw nothing wrong with him considering students friends, texting them after school, or discussing inappropriate subjects with us. I just assumed that’s just what high school directors did. It made me feel grown up.
If I had known back then, if any of us had, that this was not normal, things might be different. He might not have taken advantage of a drunk student. She might not have had to deal with that trauma. We as a band might not have had to come to terms quite so hard that our director that we loved so much was a creep all along.
Openly discussing the issue at hand is not inappropriate. Brushing it under the rug and just nodding our heads while going “such a shame” isn’t conducive to anyone. And maybe discussing it isn’t guaranteed to do any good either, but it’s a lot better than ignoring the problem. I’m all for respectfully discussing the situation, because I wish people had when I was a freshman.
(This isn’t a call to assume he’s guilty either. Everyone deserves a fair trial and for justice to work. I just want people to be able discuss the situation because I think it’s good to have a public discussion about it and the issue of inappropriate conduct as a whole.)